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REPORTS FROM THE TROOPS
FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 23

"STILL KICKING CLINTON AROUND"
THE MEDIA AREN'T THE ONLY CLINTON ADDICTS

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It's already a month into the Dubya era, but the rabid Internet right can't seem to let go of their old political chew toy, Bill Clinton. A case in point is a posting by Los Angeles attorney Brian Buckley that is making the rounds of political junkies' e-mailboxes. Buckley is the nephew of conservative icon William F. Buckley Jr. and general counsel for FreeRepublic.com, a cyberspace rallying ground for the hard right and all things anti-Clinton (including some truly bizarre threads crowing with unrestrained joy over the former president's skin-cancer diagnosis). Buckley is one of the so-called "freepers" who led the call to arms to boycott Clinton's $100K appearance at a Morgan Stanley get-together this winter.

Posting on January 25 under his FreeRepublic screen name "Clarity," Buckley said, "Why be so easy on the Clintons? Even after they are dead, I say we stuff their bodies, fix them in some kind of preservative and display them at county fairs across the nation, on a rotating basis where the citizenry can have fun putting cow dung on them (remember that's 'art'). If that's not in good taste, their bodies should be flattened thin as possible, again fixed in some kind of preservative and hoisted up a flag pole to flap in the wind."

As a Brentwood-based attorney, isn't Buckley worried his extremist tone could be bad for business? Apparently not.

"I know what's going to come out in your newspaper," says the lawyer. "You've done hit pieces on us before, and I don't care what you say."

Buckley explains that his post was a send-up of a fellow freeper's earlier, "obsessive and bizarre" post about the Clintons. "Someone put up this crazy post about hounding them to death, and my reply was merely Swiftian satire," he says. ''If my post is taken out of that context, of course it looks crazy." Having unearthed the FreeRepublic thread in question, it seems to OffBeat that Mr. Buckley is doing a bit of verbal tap-dancing not unlike that of his nemesis, Clinton. The post that prompted Buckley's diatribe reads as follows: "Clinton not only must spend the rest of his days in jail, but everything he stood for and championed must be thoroughly repudiated, discredited, and disgraced . . . He must never be given a moment's peace from the continuing judges' gavels as long as he roams the earth . . . The long legal knives of conservatives must be sharpened against Bill Clinton and his wife, Hillary, and they and their gang must be victimized by the legal system in a manner that will make all conservatives proud." Satire is a tricky business, but surely a truly Swiftian take would have been to suggest the Clintons' canonization, or naming an airport after them, like their patron saint, Reagan. But as a lackey of the Liberal Media, what would OffBeat know?
--Johnny Angel

SEE ALSO: CLINTODERM CJ SEE ALSO:  "Clintodone"

NEXT:  COUP2K ACTION ALERT TO THE UN HCRC

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