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RESISTANCE DISPATCHES
WEDNESDAY - APRIL 25, 2001

E-MAIL ON THE 'MARQUIS DE SCOTUS' RULING
Resistance Fighters on Federalist House of Pain

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From: "Karen S."
To: "BBBR Resistance" <thediva@coup2k.com>
Sent: Tuesday, April 24, 2001 10:17 PM
Subject: Re: [BBBResistance] SATIRE: The Marquis de SCOTUS Strikes Again

Dear Diva,

This court decision raises some interesting possibilities. I can picture Malificentia's former clientele cruising the streets ostensibly NOT wearing their seat belts while talking on hand-held cell phones. They may also remove license plates from their cars, disable a couple of lights and commit other offenses in an attempt to have the thrill of being stopped by those brave men in blue.

But what happens if the cops are busy that night with a couple of drive-by shootings? What will Malificentia's ex-clients do if they have to resort to more and more dangerous acts to get noticed?

Public safety is at stake here.

And now our esteemed dictator of New York City, Rudolfo il Giulianio can have the thrill of watching the Transit Police arrest unsuspecting subway and bus passengers for daring to place a bag on an empty seat (at midnight when the trains/buses aren't full). I'm sure it will help him recover from his prostate problems when he is "overcome" by the spectacle of the brave boys in blue slapping the cuffs on dog walkers who make the mistake of going out of their apts. with only their keys in their pockets.

How DARE anyone go outside without ID???

(FYI, dear Diva, there have actually been incidents like the above: a man really was arrested for having placed his backpack on the seat next to him in a near-empty subway car and when challenged by the police, he failed to produce ID; and there was a woman who was out walking her dog along Riverside Drive and who was arrested for failure to produce an ID. I think the cases were thrown out - but after this SCOTUS decision, maybe the cases wouldn't be.)

Karen

From: "Elizabeth C."
To: "BBBR Resistance" <thediva@coup2k.com>
Sent: Tuesday, April 24, 2001 10:17 PM
Subject: Re: ADULT SATIRE: The Marquis de SCOTUS Strikes Again

Dear Diva Tammy:

It just makes me crazy when people like you assume that everything is going to be fair and square, when anyone with any sense knows that is not true.

Take me, for instance.  I am a SWF, and a big fan of "NYPD Blue" (and I also like "Third Watch" too), and I would love to meet a forceful policeman in a titillating situation like the one that soccer mom found herself in (without kids to make it awkward, of course), but what are the chances?

You are no better than Oprah, getting people's hopes up for nothing.

(Why don't you just tell me to "be myself," and that my soulmate will fall magically into my lap?)

Please.

If you would just think about it for a minute, you would see that you haven't thought this SCOTUS ruling thing through at all.

What chance does someone like me, a 40-something SWF, living in an expensive and exclusive housing development, who drives a 2001 Lexus, have of getting cuffed and arrested?  Of getting roughed up at all?

Slim to none.

I could drive around with my seatbelt hanging out my car door, shooting sparks, and I wouldn't get arrested, I bet.

Nope.

Most of the people that are going to get arrested under the decision are exactly the kind of people who won't be able to appreciate it, or its romantic possibilities: straight, young, urban black men.

Just you wait and see.  There will be a "rash" of young black men who, oddly enough, suddenly "refuse" to wear their seatbelts.  You can bet money on it.

And it's just NOT FAIR.

--Betty C.

NEXT: "E-Groups" from "SEARCH ENGINE"

TODAY: "E-Groups" from SEARCH ENGINE By Duffield
TODAY: Weakest Link - The New U.N. By Steve Young
TODAY: Delayed Confessions of a Bullied Inner Child
TODAY: Palast Named Official BBBR Court Journalist
TUESDAY: Marquis de SCOTUS Ruling on Arrests
TUESDAY: How Does This Happen? By Tally Briggs
THURSDAY: A Change of Heart By Brew
THURSDAY: Back in the Saddle Again
THURSDAY: E-Mail: More Reports from The Troops
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ACTION ALERT! Gore in Springfield,MA-Today, April 25
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